Post break up Travel (DSD special)

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The response to my Post break up Travel series was phenomenal. I am still baffled, that I was able to take you through the journey from finding out Intuition: A blessing in disguise to ultimately Connecting the dots in Costa Rica.

Many readers reached out to me over the course of the series with words of encouragement and disbelief. Some even shared their personal experiences of dealing with a break-up. All I can say is wow, never judge a book by it covers because you will be surprised by how many people have gone through the same things as you. This was the case for Jason and I, so it was only right that he wrapped up my post break up series with a special.

Enjoy

x

 

 

Reading Jenna blogs, I was drawn by her energy and I felt like I was reading a woman’s point of view about my life. So, when she asked me to conclude her “Post break up travel series” I had to get involved.

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When I got the email!

Breakups can be very brutal especially in long-term relationships.  You don’t socialise for weeks and you always got the tissues out drying those tears. I get it. I truly do! That’s exactly what I did. I was with someone for nearly 6 years and we were engaged for 8 months before she exposed herself to be cheating for half of our relationship with multiple guys. If we weren’t in the gardens of Canary Wharf,  I swear to God, I’d have done something I’d have regretted and a family would have been…

RIP

You get my drift

Who’d have thought that someone who was a devoted Seven Day Adventist (and who had thoughts about waiting for marriage to sleep with anyone) could do something so spiteful and hurtful, let alone accept my marriage proposal? All those Friday nights of not seeing her because I thought she was at church preparing her songs for the next day. She was using her vocal cords alright, crying out for the Lord?

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I even remember going to the sexual health clinic like a week after she told me (I was too scared to go beforehand), she had been cheating and the doctor there was speechless to what I just exposed to him. You’d have thought that it’s something he’d come across on a regular basis. I was nervous to go because she apparently started cheating back while visiting family and friends back home in St Lucia. We all know sexual health isn’t as big back in the Caribbean unlike here. Thankfully, all results came back negative. One moment, you’re planning your life with someone to then be so lost and what to do next because you gave that person all that power even though they didn’t give a shit about you.

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I am not a woman but my ‘intuition’ was right about that woman but I couldn’t accept it, I chose not to accept it. Like Alicia Keys said, “Love is blind”. I now believe love is a two-way thing, she didn’t love me, otherwise, she wouldn’t have done what she did.

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Cheaters are scumbags. No debate

You can read my full blog on Cheating

I understand black men have this reputation of cheating and entertaining multiple women but I can safely say, I am not one of them. Once I am in a committed relationship, that’s it. One woman guy and that! Nevertheless, I find, Dating in 2018 is long

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Just like Jenna said in her Berlin blog, I had to give you A bit of backstory before I can tell you how I moved forward. Thankfully, I found travelling was also my remedy to get over the harsh break-up. It helped me clear my mind and speed up the emotional healing process. If you don’t know already, solo leisurely travel is a great and fun idea anyway. But when you’re trying to get away from the norm to think things thoroughly, everything I’d normally feel while I was trying to heal at home just felt 10 times better and had more of a meaning. If you can walk the streets of Frankfurt, Germany alone as a hooded black man, you should be able to feel confident in conquering any tasks, right?

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Being away with my phone on Airplane mode, so no-one could contact me was beautiful. I was country hopping (Malta and Austria) and no-one even knew my whereabouts or what I was getting up to. I only flew back to London because my friend was moving across the globe with her now husband and she had a night out to celebrate. I’d still be out there now if I had a choice tbh.

Travelling makes you grow and trust me I’ve grown from my experiences. I understand travelling alone can be scary but there are operators that cater especially to solo travellers. I’ve never used them but it can be handy if you need some help to discover a new country and fantastic adventures. For women travellers, there are of course challenges and dangers, I understand there are scumbag men who might prey on you because you’re alone in another country but just be aware of your surroundings, stay alert and you should be good.

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This might sound mad, but I am happy I had to go through the above because it made me who I am today. This confident, fun loving, Darkside Don.

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Check out my blogs @ jason-rt.com

If you would like to keep up with Jason, please, please, please check out his blog. Jason is one of my favourite male bloggers, he writes from a Raw place, with absolutely no filter. On more than one occasion he has left me thinking, well damn! I love that he is relatable and it always great to hear a man perspective on things like relationships, especially sensitive topics like cheating.
It is no secret that women are more vocal when it comes to talking openly about their experience of cheating. Women are so vocal to the point, where I almost forget that it can happen to Men too and it does. I loved how just like me, Jason used Travel as a way to help him get over the madness of his break-up and come out stronger on the other side. Who knew that using Travel for personal therapy could be so powerful and have endless benefits?
Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this guest post, just as much as we enjoyed collaborating together.  Have you used TRAVEL as an escape in the past? if so where did you go and in what ways did it help you and your situation? let me know in the comments below or you can reach out to us on Twitter @Jason_R_T me  @Jennasworldview
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Stay Blessed
Lots of Love
Jenna
xoxo

16 thoughts on “Post break up Travel (DSD special)

  1. Pingback: Post Break Up Travel (DSD special)

  2. I have been one of many to follow the post break up travel series from the start. As much as I’m sad it’s over, I’m glad you ended with a DSD special.
    As women I think we are quick to scream “men are trash” (which they are lol) but so are women and actually men are out there experiencing heartbreak just like us, the representation is everything. I loved reading from a no filtered male perspective and I will be checking out Jason’s blog.
    Keep them coming Jenna, I’m here for every one!!

    Liked by 2 people

    • Men are trash lol – majority of them are, there is 0.1% that are not LOL!

      I really wanted him to add the finishing touches to this series because it is important for women to know that they are not alone!
      Thank you for following the journey, love you man❤️

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Wait so firstly I’ve missed the initial post break up travel series so I need to go back and read that. But wow this is very sad but reassuring at the same time.

    I’ve never really thought of solo travelling as a way to help getting over a break up but it makes a lot of sense, esp for the type of person I am.

    It was very good to have a male’s perspective as most men don’t usually speak up about heartbreak or how they feel about a break up in general

    Liked by 2 people

  4. wow this is a very intesting and sad post. One thing I really like about this is how you talked about a males perspective because I feel like guys don’t always have a chance to talk about how they feel or explain their side of the story when it comes to heartbreak.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Wow this post is so eye opening! I have never read a post about the males perspective of a break up and this just goes to show that men have feelings too and are hurt just as much as women are. I’m so glad I came across this post and thank you for introducing me to Jason! Xo

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Thank You for offering a male perspective. In a world where feminism has become so popular (in my personal opinion) I feel this was refreshing to see. Not all men are trash, not all men are dogs, not all men are cheaters. Many of them go through the same struggles [in relationships] that women do. Very well done and a great ending to the series! Thank you both for sharing your journey

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I love your blog so much! Great post, so inspiring and motivating. Travel is such an extraordinary thing! I admire the realness and transparency of which you share you story and experience. I love the why you write!

    Like

  8. This is an awesome post. Jason really is 1 of my fav male bloggers. I really love the concept of solo travelling helping to get over a breakup. Travelling is honestly such an amazing thing and a great way to clear you’re head.

    I have solo travelled once, but I am in the process of booking another one soon.

    I am definitely going to check out your previous posts and follow your blog.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. First, let me start on a positive note; I am happy you were able to find your clarity and find yourself after your breakup through solo travel. I think traveling is a great way to breathe whenever you’re going through anything big. Getting away from the familiar and injecting yourself with something new is such an amazing feeling.

    I also like the fact that you’re a black man talking about solo travel after a breakup. Usually it’s women sharing their truth like Jenna did in her original post. Now…

    Jason…Jason…I can’t get down with the idea of putting down our Caribbean people. Cause nooo joke – since I’ve been living here and on the dating scene, the way men in London don’t practice safe sex, don’t get tested, accused me of being a heaux for practicing safe sex…the rampant mess of it all! Compared to my sexual encounters back in the Caribbean – nah. You can’t do Caribbean like that. I don’t think it matters where she cheated, the fact is she didn’t practice safe sex. You can argue that certain countries have higher std/sti rates but the fact is unsafe sex puts you at risk. point. blank. period. This is also why I believe in getting tested when you’re in a relationship. I don’t care who want get mad, the only person whose parts I 100% know where they’ve been are my own.

    The other thing I didn’t really agree with is you saying the bit about her being 7th day adventist. I am not Christian but I get very uncomfortable when people put others in a box based on their Christianity. “could you believe he did that, he’s a pastor?” “and she claims to be a child of god”. I believe a 7th Day Adventist would cheat because before she was a believer, she was a human being. She is allowed to make mistakes, bad choices, she’s allowed to sin. I believe she would accept your proposal, even while cheating and being a christian. Cause she’s human!

    But other than those two things, I enjoyed the post. Hearing about these topics from a different point of view was refreshing. I’m happy you came out stronger and brighter. I hope you find the person that is meant for you and who respects your love, energy and time. Blessings!!

    Like

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