The Poison of Comparison

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Comparison

 is a

Joy killer

Peace thief

and

Happiness Assassin

Be careful not to get yourself caught up in comparing yourself to others. I know that this is easier said than done because most of us spend our time scrolling through social media. We are bombarded with the lives of others on a daily basis and it has become the new normal. The snapshots we see of other peoples lives can sometimes make us feel some type of way about our own. Everyone has compared themselves to others at some point in their life.

Most of us know that comparing yourself to others is not healthy, but from time to time we do indulge in it. It might start off small at first and you probably won’t notice that you are doing it and then suddenly it becomes a bad habit that you simply just can’t kick. It can lead to you developing negative feelings towards yourself and this can be very harmful.

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Comparing yourself to others is a deadly practice that will most likely leave you unmotivated, envious and upset. Abort mission immediately because all these kinds of feelings are just not worth the hassle.  Everyone in life is running their own race, at their own pace and on their own time. Try your best not to get caught up in watching others because it will prevent you navigating in your own lane. You can’t possibly live your best life if your eyes are peeled elsewhere.

When you come to understand the importance of time and the seasons of life, you will never compare yourself to another person again. Everyone’s walk on the earth is different. No two roads travelled will ever be the same and the quicker you realise this the better. It is ok to be inspired by others, just do not go as far as comparing yourself to them. The blogging world is amazing, with so many great bloggers out there doing great things that I would love to do. If I started comparing myself to them then you probably would not be reading this blog. I have come to know and accept that my life as well as my journey, is unique to me.

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The poison of comparison will ultimately affect your happiness, the way you see yourself and how you live your life. It does you no favours whatsoever, so please I kindly ask of you to stop indulging in this kind of behaviour immediately. It is totally not worth it Boo. Do not compare yourself to people on the internet and don’t you dare compare yourself to anyone you know in real life.

If you are looking at others peoples life and wondering why you do not have what they have or why you are not where they are, you are heading in dangerous territory. Comparing yourself to others will only damage the way you see yourself, your life and your blessings.

I know that this is not an easy thing to do, so if you find yourself sipping the poison of comparison again try to remember the following gems:

  1. Stay in your lane.
  2. If you are not happy, take those necessary steps to make changes.
  3. Do not beat yourself up because everyone is running their own race.
  4. The internet is a snapshot of highlights and that is all it will ever be
  5. Today for you, tomorrow for someone else
  6. Your time will come
  7. Do you
  8. Love you
  9. Focus on you

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Stay blessed

Lots of Love

Jenna

xoxo

Can you Slay and Love the Lord?

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I have been blogging for just over 3months now and I believe that with each blog post, you have been able to get to know me a little better. I love that and now I have decided to dive in a little deeper and open up another layer of my life to you. I kindly ask that you don’t judge me. Whatever your thoughts are about religion, hold fire and read this blog post with an open mind.

Now, this may come as a shock to some of you, but I am a water baptised, born-again Christian. I still try to “pops flavour and drips sauce” but this is a challenge in itself because I am often torn between the expected social norms of Christianity and the battle of being a 26 year old female living in 2018. Now if you read 26 & never been on a Bae-cation, you would know that from a young age I planned out my whole life. I can definitely tell you now that being born again in my 20s was never a part of my plan, but God was clearly waiting on me at the door.

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For a very long time, I put off the idea of getting right with the Lord. I used to think that my life would be over if I finally decided to chase after God. No more slay, no more enjoyment, life as I knew it would completely stop. Vybz Kartel would have to be traded in for Kirk Franklin and I would now spend the rest of days in Bible study. I just couldn’t bring myself to do this “God-thing properly”. I enjoyed our part-time relationship because it was convenient for me and it worked around my shenanigans, lol. Not to mention, I had become so accustomed to living by my own rules and I wasn’t really interested in giving that up.

I used to think why should I switch things up now? The Lord and I had a good thing going. As far back as I could remember, I would tell God what I wanted and he ALWAYS delivered. Whether that be my job at the bank, my first class degree in Psychology, financial blessings or any other opportunities. I did what I wanted with my life and then TOLD God he needs to co-sign my madness. As crazy as this sounds, this is exactly how I was living. So why in the world, would I give all of that up whilst living in a society where everyone does as they please?

As of February 2018, in Great Britain alone only 50.7% of the population identify as Christians and the percentage of those who actually practise the religion is much lower than that. It is safe to say that for some people Christianity/ religion isn’t seen as a driving force in their lives nowadays. So I knew that taking such a big step in my 20s was going to come at a cost. Choosing to love the Lord on a full-time basis, was going to require some real-life transformations from the inside out.

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I probably came up with a 100 reasons why I shouldn’t get baptised. Fear made me panic and I was making up all kinds of things in my head. What type of clothes could I wear, what kind of places would I be able to go to, do I have to change my friendship circle, will I have to marry a Pastors son? I seemed to believe that if I took such a huge step my life would somehow be restricted. My social life, image, purity,  purpose, relationships, career, my desires, my needs and my future was going to be impacted by choosing to be a born-again Christian. I knew it was going to be life-changing, but I felt the fear and did it anyway and I am so glad I did.

trust.jpgLife on the other side of being born again has been challenging. Learning how to live in the world but not be of it has truly stretched me beyond measure. The struggle to find the right balance between living my life and honouring my relationship with God is REAL. There have been days where I have thrown in the towel, called it a day on this Christianity thing and temporarily tapped out. Obviously, none of that has ever lasted because I always seem to find my way back to God one way or another.

I mess up from time to time, make mistakes, I say and do things that aren’t necessarily a great representation of my religion. It is not an easy road. The tug of war between the old me Vs the new me is very intense. The Old Jenna wants to wear, do and say whatever she wants, whilst the new Jenna has to try and keep with up the values of being a Christian in a modern world. Sex before marriage, modesty on social media, drinking alcohol, listening to secular music……its A LOT to juggle, but it can be done.

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So to answer the blog title is YES. It is 100% possible to love God with all your heart, be strong in your faith and serve your best slay. Personally, the only way I have been able to do this is by having BALANCE. Balance is key! Balance is everything! When I found Christ, I was yielded to come as I am. God isn’t interested in how well I can scream hallelujah, wear the longest skirts to church or put on a good Christian performance. To me, God really doesn’t care about any of that, he is more interested in living in my heart, the renewing of my mind & for me to experience the love he has for me. I could be wrong, but this is just the way I see things.

All that other extra stuff, God is not interested in. I still go out, I still get dressed up, I still have fun. Me having a relationship with God hasn’t stopped me from doing anything. I am now more mindful of how I display the values of my faith through my words and actions. As well the type of things that I feed to my soul. I know some Christians that don’t listen to secular music or eat shrimps and if that works for them, that’s great. It just won’t work for me. Being a Christian It is not an easy road to walk, sometimes I want to choke people out, get angry and talk all kinds of wreck lol. I still have my moments, I am not perfect by any means. I mess up and I probably will mess up again in the future, but this doesn’t stop me from loving God or him loving me.

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Although my appetite for certain things has changed, I haven’t stopped squeezing the juice out of life. I am more fierce than ever and I am confident in my sauce alongside all the other things that I bring to the table. Being born again hasn’t resulted in me being chained to the foot of my bed mesmerising holy scriptures. No no no, I have truly come into my own, running after everything God says that I can have. Meeting new people, having new experiences, coming out of my shell and sharing my gifts and talents with the world.

Yes, I have had to make some significant changes to my mindset and lifestyle, but these changes have been for the better. My life is actually more vibrant than it has ever been. Being born again has opened new doors for me and I truly feel like my life is soaring and it is not going to stop. How silly of me to think that stepping deeper into my faith would have hindered me from living an abundant life. This is why you should never let your fears lead you. I feel far from restricted or tied down because of my relationship with God. I  am now more confident than ever to go out into the world and do what I was created to do.

Personally for me, if I didn’t have my relationship with God, my slay would be non-existent and that’s a fact. My identity, my abilities, my confidence, who I am and who I will become is deeply rooted in my relationship with God. This is the secret formula behind my slay and without God, I would be dust. If I never had a relationship with God, #JennasWorldview wouldn’t even exist. My blog posts are heavily inspired by my faith and my life experiences. I strongly believe that God has blessed with this platform so that I can share my story and connect with people just like you. My relationship with God is my foundation and being born again has a really helped encourage me to live a full life.

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As I said it is possible to Slay and Love the Lord, but that doesn’t eliminate you from being scrutinised for doing both. It actually comes with the territory. I got a message from a lady on Instagram saying how could I be a Christian and have pictures up of myself on the beach? lol. Wooo Chile! I wanted to tell her about her mother in 12 different languages, but that was not in line with my good Christian values. So I had to handle that one with grace instead. Its safe to say she will think twice before she jumps in anyone else’s DMs. Now if I wasn’t secure in who I am something like that probably could have destroyed me or made me reluctant to grow in my faith.

I don’t mean to play devil’s advocate here but the people who display these facades of being oh so holy Christians are usually the ones that God can not recognise. The Bible teaches us about people who scream the Lord names in public but they are not for him. I am not about putting on a show by trying to act like a good Christian. I could pray for hours and speak in holy tongues until I am blue in the face, but if my heart isn’t right, God won’t be listening. What is in my heart and the strength of my relationship with God is the most important thing above everything.

I will be honest and say that I was fearful about how people were going to act towards me. To the point where I wanted to keep being born again on a low. I thought that people were going to ridicule me in judgement. So when cousin accidentally uploaded my baptism on snapchat, I had instant heart failure. Big up to the 12 people who saw me get baptised, I love you all lol. I deleted those snaps because I wasn’t ready to share that with everyone at the time. I felt like people were going to question the authenticity of my faith if they knew I was a born-again Christian. I actually believed that people would be scrolling through my social media looking at my pictures and saying I am a disgrace to Christianity lol. It is no secret that when religion is mentioned it has the power to change the atmosphere in a room.

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I have heard a few ‘wow you don’t look a Christain, or ‘I wouldn’t think that you would be a Christian’ before. I always hit those people with the same question ‘what exactly does a Christian look like’ no one has ever been able to answer. I guess it is subjective rather than objective right?. Once upon a time, I was caught up on how people would perceive me but I have managed to push past it and focus more on pleasing God rather than feeding peoples perception of me. Since I started taking this approach my walk with God has become 10x better. The journey has been filled with many highs and lows, but I wouldn’t want it any other way.

To conclude, life after being born again does not suddenly turn into a snooze fest, Issa lie boo. Don’t ever get it twisted, if anyone tells you that you cant be a Christian and live a full life is a liar with tax. You can Slay & Love God just as much. Being a Christian requires transformation from the inside out, but that doesn’t stop you from living life abundantly. People are going to talk and judge you regardless because that is the way the world works. Do not let that stop your slay or hinder you from loving the Lord.

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I hope this blog post has been insightful to you in some way, shape or form. I was hesitant to open up about my faith, as I had reservations about how it would be received. I no longer feel this way as I believe this blog post will resonate with the right people.

I would love to hear from you about your thoughts on this piece, hit me up in the comments below or find me on  Twitter, Facebook & Instagram @JennasWorldView.

P.S. If you enjoy any of my blog posts, please share them via your social media. My aim is to connect with as many people as possible.

Ohhh yeah: Those amazing quotes pictures that you saw throughout this post, I found them on Google, they don’t belong to me boo.

Thank you so much for taking the time out to read this blog post, I look forward to sharing more with you soon.

Stay blessed

Lots of love

Jenna

xoxo

The cost of living a lie. . .

 

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Living a lie: To live in a way that is dishonest because you are pretending to be something that you are not, to yourself or to other people

Everyone at some point in their life has lived a lie or is currently living one right now.

There.

I Said it.

Sometimes it is not intentional. It can happen so easily that you didn’t even realise you were doing it. Days, months and years can rapidly go by whilst those lies have embedded themselves so perfectly into your life. You have become so accustomed to it, that you can no longer differentiate the real from the fake. After spending a significant amount of time deceiving others, you have become so unrecognizable even to yourself.

When I thought about it deeply, most of us were encouraged to engage in pretend play as children. It was where some of us mastered the ‘Art of pretending’. Putting on a different face and persona depending on who or what we wanted to be. I couldn’t help but wonder if our natural ability to pretend and fake it as children has secretly crept into our adulthood? Is this the reason why some people are out here on social media lying hard through them filters to maintain a false image of who they really are? If it’s not this, could our families or upbringing be to blame?

In some households, children were taught from an early age not to discuss their family business. Forced to cover things up and keep family secrets to ensure a clean image of the family was maintained. Even if things were going wrong. Could this be the missing link or am I reaching? Lol. I may not be clear on what causes people to pretend and live a lie. I just know that the consequences of doing so will cause more harm than good.

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To be honest, it actually baffles me that people can go online and create a magnified persona and lifestyle that is so far away from who they really are. I know this is something that has been happening for years but it has now reached new heights within today’s society. Celebrities, reality TV personas and social Influencers have done changed the game. It is so easy to deceive and be deceived. In the world of social media, lace frontal’s serve scalp realness, flat tummy tea and waist trainers can give you a flat stomach without a proper diet and those are just some of the most bait common examples.

Look what happened to #VisaBae last week, she was out here doing luxury life on the gram. Yet she was facing deportation, having to desperately beg her followers to finance her visa. Who am I to say #IssaScam? It is not my story to tell, but what I will say is #VisaBae is a prime example of the people who portray to live a luxury lifestyle online that does not reflect their actual reality. The funny thing is, #VisaBae is no different to the millions of people across the world who lie about their lives, she just exposed herself.

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Fake is the new normal and its here to stay

These days everyone is striving to look like they have become while missing out on the process of becoming? Hiding behind filtered pictures, accompanied by powerful captions that are so far away from their truth. Many people scream ‘its just social media’ don’t take it seriously when in fact it is a big deal. Social media has shaped the way we view ourselves and others, whether we like it or not. It is so easy to get “lost in the sauce”. Seeing other people travel, start a business, embark on new ventures, get married or start a family can have a person feeling as if their life is not flourishing.

Sadly, today’s culture is very much driven by what can be seen. So there is no surprise why many individuals feel as if they need to appear as though every area of their life is intact. People are out here flexing. Doing shows. Losing their dignity and damaging their peace of mind just to portray themselves as something they are not. The pressure is real out here in these streets and so is the self-scrutiny. Many individuals start to feel like they not good enough or that their lives lack something because they are not doing gymnastics to pose in a pair of red bottoms on the gram.

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As a newbie blogger, I had to check out the blogging community to see what was out there. There are many bloggers who are doing some amazing things that I am not doing and that is ok. My time will come. Instead of being jealous of what I saw others doing online, I was inspired more than ever to get started. Social media is so powerful it can make people jealous, bitter and envious of what other people have or appear to have. It is shameful, but its happening. Aunty Lorna (my mum) has always told me that I must never ever envy other people. Especially for material things, as I do not know what they had to go through to get them. I will always live by this gem and you should too.

As you read this, just know there are major personalities in the media, who appear to be bold, confident and have it all. Behind the scenes, they are lonely, sad, depressed, addicted, or on the brink of suicide. Yet just by what they post, there are people out there who would trade places with them in a heartbeat. People crave for things they have no real idea about and it needs to stop.

The girl who posts three times a day about her “fantastic relationship”, shows off all her luxury gifts from her man is actually in debt. Baby girl is robbing one credit card to pay the other, all because she is maintaining the man. The poor thing pays for everything behind the scenes yet you can’t stand her because it looks like she “has it all”. Other girls are out here getting pissed on by a rich dude for a handbag & flight to the Maldives just to flash about on the socials. Believe it or not, guys are out here doing just as much crazy things as women to maintain a false image. Certain dudes are out engaging in so much illegal activity just to sport designer clothes. All while they sleep on the cold floor of their mum’s council property that is drowning in rent arrears.

MAD

MAD

MAD

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Most people shy away from their truth by using things like drugs, relationships, raving, alcohol etc as a disguise for their problems or pain. When my 7-year relationship ended in 2016. I was hurt and I had every right to be. To deal with the aftermath of my break up I spent money. Not no eeeeediat, I spent lots of money, I booked holidays, concerts, festivals, I purchased things impulsively as a way to pacify my pain and hide how I was truly feeling.

I did some crazy things LOL but I don’t actually regret them. I am happy that it was money that I used as an outlet to soothe my heartbreak. It was a beautiful nightmare that allowed me to learn a great deal about myself, even though the process was bludclart painful. By lying to myself about how I was feeling and living only delayed my healing and new blessings. I did overtime trying to convince MYSELF that I was all good. When I finally gave in, I went down a bitter-sweet road of self-discovery. I had no choice but to turn my pain into power and it has opened more doors for me than living in that lie ever did.

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One thing life has taught me so far is that you can lie to other people, but you cant lie to yourself or the creator. No matter how hard you try, your demons will catch up to you. So it’s better, to be honest, and true to yourself. You may feel like you are so far gone into the lies that you are unable to get out of it. Issa lie boo. I have said this before and I will say it again unless you are dead in the grave, there is still time for a change, real change. It is ok. You can stop pretending. Take those necessary steps because living a lie on social media is one thing, but living a lie in real life is another.

The cost of living in a lie will ultimately destroy you. It’s no secret that other people will get hurt in the process but the real damage is the harm that YOU inflict on yourself. Pretending to be ok when you are not ok is not ok. Saving face to maintain a false image of yourself and your lifestyle is not ok. Spending money you don’t have to keep up with the Jones will only lead you to financial problems. Doing things to please other people when you know deep down it’s not right with your soul is not ok. So I write this piece to challenge you to Breathe and Live in your authentic truth.

Everyone was created with God-given purpose and it is our duty in this life to discover what that is and use it for the greater good. When you live in a lie you only rob yourself of the life, opportunities and relationships that were ordained for you. In my last post ‘Issa New Month: APRIL’ I spoke about the importance of reflection and how we must practise it to evaluate our thoughts, actions and behaviours. Do yourself a favour and be honest with where you are. If you know that deep down you are not living truthfully, its time to remove the mask.

Don’t be afraid. There is no need for you to pretend to be anything other than what you were created to be. Living a lie will only take you further than you ever intended to go and who knows where you could end up. Embrace who you are and where you are at in your life, because you only get one. Jcole was right when he said: “no such thing as a life that’s better than yours. This is why you must Love Yours AND LIVE IN YOUR TRUTH.

 

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2018 for me is the year for real life change, growth, transformation and positive scandals. It is not limited to just me though, you can get in on some of this good stuff too, but you have to be intentional about what you want out of life. Think about it, but not for too long. Whoa, this was a heavy post so I HAVE to end it with a prayer.

Dear Heavenly Father, I pray for the individual reading this, I pray that you will stirrup in them the urge to throw off their mask and step into their beautiful God-given truth. May they find the courage to be who you created and called them to be. Let every situation that causes them to hurt, lie, cheat, steal and deceive may it be uprooted and destroyed. In order to make room for new things to be planted in their life that will lead them further into their destiny.

Amen.

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Stay blessed peeps

Twitter, Instagram & Facebook @JennasWorldView

 

Lots Of Love

Jenna

xoxo

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